i make sucka MCs uncomfortable

i dont know, i just like that line. I will defenitely use it in a rhyme sometime.

It has been a long time since I have blogged. Life has been hapening very fast, and I have been doing more thinking on my own without a journal or a computer. It is rare for me to have lapses in journaling like this, but a lot of it has to do with how strapped i've been for time i have been recently. Plus, i have been processing a lot of stuff that is more personal than i am willing to put on here.

Thanks to all of you who read this regularly. All the homies

Today at TAS, my reading group went exceptionally well. I have been a little frustrated recently with how it had been going. I felt like I was starting to get boring and unmotivating to the kids, and i was beginning to hear sighs and rolled eyes when it would be their turn to come to my group. I wanted to change that, so I decided that even if i was still feeling tired and the coffee had not taken its effect, that i would muster up all the enthusiasm i could and try to model the enthusiastic character and charisma of the teacher i work with. it has worked so far. the kids are more focused, they are interested and learning more.
I think it comes down to a matter of really using what i already have. I think that God is trying to urge me on to being more awar of the gifts i have, and to use them consciously and in a responsible, mature way. One of these is teaching/working with kids. It is in me, i just need to be intentional about using it.

We have been reading a story from the reading textbook called 'The Big Bushy Moustache' In which a Mexican-American boy gets tired of people telling him he looks like his mother, and decides to steal a prop moustache from the school play in order to go home and impress his dad, hoping that people will think he looks like his dad.
The kids in my class have really liked it so far.

Also, something that has been happening recently is that I have been overseeing/refereeing organized soccer games among the 2nd grade boys. This has been a stressful but feun experience. It is fun watching them really get into it, and develop a sense of camraderie with each other (even though at age 7 and 8 they really need to work on sportsmanship) They love imagining themselves as the great Mexican club teams like Pumas and Chivas and Veracruz

At Walden, things have been so so much better than they were last semester. God has really blessed me there this month-- and i can see now why he may have wanted me to stay.
I have really gained the trust of the 5th and 6th graders-- which is no easy task, and has let to me really gaining a lot of confidence for myself and my own feelings about my job there, but also i have begun to have influence on them, which is such a great feeling. Havign influence on children as an adult is not a given, especially when the context is very loose and informal as this after school program is. The kids at TAS give me their trust qucik becasue 1. they are younger 2. i came into the role of 'teacher' At Walden, I had no ready authority handed to me. Thatwas part of why i was frustrated. But now that i am more confident and assured in my relationships with the older kids, it has even boosted my confidence with my boss-- and things have been much better with him, too. Not to mention my co-workers, who have even begun initiating friendship outside of work.

It is all gravy

other than that, there is much. many thoughts, about my life, my persona, my social life/character, my ministry, my family, my relationships......too much to put down here.
I am relieved these days to see that God is still working through me. I have hope